There is a sick desperation in my laugh today.
Life as I know it is over, I say to myself.
Hard though it is to understand, compromise is all i am left to do.
All the things i used to hate about my home feel so flowery suddenly.
But I love the way I am, even when the world pushes me to change, I justify my resistance.
And there is a sick desperation in my laugh today.
There is a hollow sarcasm in my words today.
The choice was mine and I was proud, I know I was.
But this is not the job i signed up for, though there is no going back.
Sometimes I wish life had a reverse gear.
Sometimes I feel I don't deserve this marvel, sometimes I feel it doesn't deserve me, and this war goes on.
And there is a hollow sarcasm in my words today.
There is a rabbit-hole in front of my eyes today.
All run to get into it, even I did.
Got rejected like a bad organ transplant, though I tried to suit myself according to it.
Now that I am outside, all i see is fallacy.
I see how it converts a human being into a machine, replacing the basic instincts with CV points.
And there is a rabbit-hole in front of my eyes today.
There is a huge cancer in the world today.
Slowly killing whatever the planet stood for.
I see how people are so eager to stab, so eager to bleed and so eager to die.
I see a father, blind though he is, throwing his son to the demon .
I see people dive deep into the dark, without knowing if there is light at the bottom, cause none came up yet.
There is a huge cancer in the world today.
Saturday, August 20, 2011
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
There it goes..
Treat me with reverence and I will treat you with dignity.
You know I need you and I know you want me.
But my ego refuses to bow down and beg.
And you wait for the day I kiss your hand and propose.
So we walk, miles down the road.
Side by side, but don’t cross paths.
We both feel the other’s presence getting close,
But we don’t look eye to eye.
Then comes the day I wake up and start to walk.
But I no longer feel you beside me.
I search for you and look for you.
And the thought of losing you haunts my day.
I promise, to put my ego aside,
And hold your hand the moment I see them.
The day goes on and I run for solace.
And the day goes on, desperation dripping from my face.
In this day of wandering and wandering,
I finally see you when the sun sets.
I see you are being carried.
By a gentle man, gentle enough to bow.
Gentle enough to wear a suit.
To go down on his knees,
Give a rose and propose.
You find this offer too enticing to refuse.
You say you still waited for me but you lie.
You never wanted me I feel.
My respect, you don’t deserve.
And I cry my heart out.
Call you back with all my soul.
But you are too far now.
And my ego refuses to bow.
You know I need you and I know you want me.
But my ego refuses to bow down and beg.
And you wait for the day I kiss your hand and propose.
So we walk, miles down the road.
Side by side, but don’t cross paths.
We both feel the other’s presence getting close,
But we don’t look eye to eye.
Then comes the day I wake up and start to walk.
But I no longer feel you beside me.
I search for you and look for you.
And the thought of losing you haunts my day.
I promise, to put my ego aside,
And hold your hand the moment I see them.
The day goes on and I run for solace.
And the day goes on, desperation dripping from my face.
In this day of wandering and wandering,
I finally see you when the sun sets.
I see you are being carried.
By a gentle man, gentle enough to bow.
Gentle enough to wear a suit.
To go down on his knees,
Give a rose and propose.
You find this offer too enticing to refuse.
You say you still waited for me but you lie.
You never wanted me I feel.
My respect, you don’t deserve.
And I cry my heart out.
Call you back with all my soul.
But you are too far now.
And my ego refuses to bow.
Saturday, June 4, 2011
US Economy on Life Support!!
Every system of governance has its own flaws. No matter how well you design the rules by which a set of people are to be governed, there will be loop holes and it is only a matter of time that someone will find those holes and use them in their own interest ( no pun intended guys!! :P ). So, logically the best and comparatively more lasting form of governance will be in which the rules are subject to change as the time demands.
Where ever we have failed to see this form of flexibility in the governance, we have seen revolts taking place and ultimately a revolution changing the root level shape in which the people will be ruled henceforth. Taking instances from history, we can see many great revolutions those have actually changed the face of earth. Talking of recent times, we can see the revolutions in the Arab world, basically due to the rigidity of the ruling set of people over there.
Talking about USA, is it likely that there will be a revolution soon?? Now to this question, many might wonder, what is the need of even a revolt in USA, leave alone revolution. Many might think that most of the revolts going on there are to legalize marijuana and prostitution, and to reduce the drinking age!! :P
But actually the citizens of the USA are perhaps among the most troubled people among the 1st world countries. And very soon, the entire economy might collapse like a standing house made of cards whose bottom most card has been removed!
This is because of the endless loans the government is taking from countries like China and passing on those loans to their citizens without ever worrying about how might they repay the loans. And the average US citizen being high on consumption, hardly does enough to repay that loan back.
Now as we know the Federal reserve prints notes on demand from the Government of the States. This amount is usually many times more than their production within the country which leads to inflation.
This causes the citizens to take more loans and this forces to government to take more. Today the national debt of the US is over $14 trillion!! and it is constantly rising every second!
http://www.usdebtclock.org/
It is impossible to create an artificial boom with the help of artificially low interest rates and not have a great depression afterwards. The real estate bubble was the largest artificial boom in history. But afterwards the federal reserve prevented a necessary depression from happening by many logically unsound means including the "Quantitative easing"- QE1 and QE2 worth trillions of dollars.
Soon the other countries will not only stop buying the US treasury bonds but also dump the existing lot they have. Then a strong military will be all the States will be left with. Then we may see a big revolt turning into a major revolution happening in the US , or we can see a series of Iraq or Afghanistan wars taking place, some major terrorist activities in the US so that they can attack any country by blaming any person of anything they like.
Lets pray that the former happens so that the world may live a few days more.
I do not want to see apocalypse happening before I die!!
Where ever we have failed to see this form of flexibility in the governance, we have seen revolts taking place and ultimately a revolution changing the root level shape in which the people will be ruled henceforth. Taking instances from history, we can see many great revolutions those have actually changed the face of earth. Talking of recent times, we can see the revolutions in the Arab world, basically due to the rigidity of the ruling set of people over there.
Talking about USA, is it likely that there will be a revolution soon?? Now to this question, many might wonder, what is the need of even a revolt in USA, leave alone revolution. Many might think that most of the revolts going on there are to legalize marijuana and prostitution, and to reduce the drinking age!! :P
But actually the citizens of the USA are perhaps among the most troubled people among the 1st world countries. And very soon, the entire economy might collapse like a standing house made of cards whose bottom most card has been removed!
This is because of the endless loans the government is taking from countries like China and passing on those loans to their citizens without ever worrying about how might they repay the loans. And the average US citizen being high on consumption, hardly does enough to repay that loan back.
Now as we know the Federal reserve prints notes on demand from the Government of the States. This amount is usually many times more than their production within the country which leads to inflation.
This causes the citizens to take more loans and this forces to government to take more. Today the national debt of the US is over $14 trillion!! and it is constantly rising every second!
http://www.usdebtclock.org/
It is impossible to create an artificial boom with the help of artificially low interest rates and not have a great depression afterwards. The real estate bubble was the largest artificial boom in history. But afterwards the federal reserve prevented a necessary depression from happening by many logically unsound means including the "Quantitative easing"- QE1 and QE2 worth trillions of dollars.
Soon the other countries will not only stop buying the US treasury bonds but also dump the existing lot they have. Then a strong military will be all the States will be left with. Then we may see a big revolt turning into a major revolution happening in the US , or we can see a series of Iraq or Afghanistan wars taking place, some major terrorist activities in the US so that they can attack any country by blaming any person of anything they like.
Lets pray that the former happens so that the world may live a few days more.
I do not want to see apocalypse happening before I die!!
Monday, March 7, 2011
Every coin has a flip-side to it. If only we can willfully and discreetly look at the right side of it then I can be sure, all our roadblocks can be avoided. Now if you are sitting inside a room, how will you be able to measure its dimensions? similarly, we are often so engrossed in the wrong side that we invariably fail to realize that there may be a blend of yellow behind this opaque blue. But how do we make this blue layer transparent-is the question.
In a world where about 34000 children die of hunger and preventable diseases everyday, we should consider ourselves very lucky shouldn't we? Then what is this bond that chains us, blinds us from all the destitute, makes us look into our problems, no matter how small they be, projects them as unmissable hurdles? What makes us feel that things can never be smooth in our lives and who said these lines- "Problem is the synonym of life"..and why? Even though I know that this society is completely paralyzed, I am still pulled in to be a part of it.
Many wise, grown ups believe that spiritual uplift brings you real happiness. Swami Vivekananda famously said, "To serve man is to serve God". Every time I hear this, I am like- "Come on man, whom are you kidding?"! The day I will serve another man only in my service to God, I will know that his problems are bigger than mine. Here, on the contrary, we give them more problems so that ours look smaller. And you are talking about serving!! The only things we can serve today are food, our company and our sentence!
I hate the concept of possessiveness. In my opinion, all the Cardinal sins have this root cause. Or maybe the human brain was programmed this way- To find something that is in scarcity and then fight for it amongst themselves! And in this fight, one simply does not care if his friend is dying for this sake. As a matter of fact, the word 'friend', I believe, is one of the most misused words in modern society. This is a free world, isn't it?? Think again!!
"None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free."
-Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe-
In a world where about 34000 children die of hunger and preventable diseases everyday, we should consider ourselves very lucky shouldn't we? Then what is this bond that chains us, blinds us from all the destitute, makes us look into our problems, no matter how small they be, projects them as unmissable hurdles? What makes us feel that things can never be smooth in our lives and who said these lines- "Problem is the synonym of life"..and why? Even though I know that this society is completely paralyzed, I am still pulled in to be a part of it.
Many wise, grown ups believe that spiritual uplift brings you real happiness. Swami Vivekananda famously said, "To serve man is to serve God". Every time I hear this, I am like- "Come on man, whom are you kidding?"! The day I will serve another man only in my service to God, I will know that his problems are bigger than mine. Here, on the contrary, we give them more problems so that ours look smaller. And you are talking about serving!! The only things we can serve today are food, our company and our sentence!
I hate the concept of possessiveness. In my opinion, all the Cardinal sins have this root cause. Or maybe the human brain was programmed this way- To find something that is in scarcity and then fight for it amongst themselves! And in this fight, one simply does not care if his friend is dying for this sake. As a matter of fact, the word 'friend', I believe, is one of the most misused words in modern society. This is a free world, isn't it?? Think again!!
"None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free."
-Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe-
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Twists and turns!!
She was right! "How on earth is someone like you" she said "with a girl like that?? She is way out of your league, dude!!" I realized the hardest way possible how right she was..
I always wanted one thing so badly in my life- to give her more happiness than I possibly can imagine of. Sometimes I wonder at the irony of life. My imagination fell short of her expectations. No matter how hard I tried, happiness was always an illusion.
I always wanted to have the perfect relationship for us. I so wonder at the sarcasm of life. Even something near perfection was always a mirage of a mirage.
I always saw others breaking apart and thought 'mine will be stainless'. Life mocks in wonderful ways. Stains never evaded us right from the starting to the end.
Sometimes I think I was the one at fault, sometimes I know so. How can she do something wrong when she is such an epitome of perfection? When she is so out of my league, I must have been the one to screw it up..
I clearly remember making so many promises, all lost somewhere- washed away with the flow of events turning around the courses of life.
Maybe it was for the general good..maybe it was for her's..maybe it wasted me forever..maybe it saved me from it..
Whatever it is, i know for sure that it definitely killed a part of me. Cause i made vows that I could not keep.
No matter how badly I want her to come back and scream at me for all the stuff i sucked at, I know she has moved on long back and I am never going to get another shot at it though I cannot possibly explain that I am willing to trade anything for a 2nd chance..
Be happy girl..That is all I pray for today..and i will forever..
I always wanted one thing so badly in my life- to give her more happiness than I possibly can imagine of. Sometimes I wonder at the irony of life. My imagination fell short of her expectations. No matter how hard I tried, happiness was always an illusion.
I always wanted to have the perfect relationship for us. I so wonder at the sarcasm of life. Even something near perfection was always a mirage of a mirage.
I always saw others breaking apart and thought 'mine will be stainless'. Life mocks in wonderful ways. Stains never evaded us right from the starting to the end.
Sometimes I think I was the one at fault, sometimes I know so. How can she do something wrong when she is such an epitome of perfection? When she is so out of my league, I must have been the one to screw it up..
I clearly remember making so many promises, all lost somewhere- washed away with the flow of events turning around the courses of life.
Maybe it was for the general good..maybe it was for her's..maybe it wasted me forever..maybe it saved me from it..
Whatever it is, i know for sure that it definitely killed a part of me. Cause i made vows that I could not keep.
No matter how badly I want her to come back and scream at me for all the stuff i sucked at, I know she has moved on long back and I am never going to get another shot at it though I cannot possibly explain that I am willing to trade anything for a 2nd chance..
Be happy girl..That is all I pray for today..and i will forever..
Thursday, January 6, 2011
There comes a time in one's life when he suddenly realizes the importance of people around him. Then he hopes, its not too late to tell them that he loves them..but more often than not, life's a bitch..
Today I want to tell u that i love you..and again i hope that its not too late..
Even before i could understand, you became more than just a part of my life..you became all of it..
if i didnt say it, it was because words were always few to explain your place here..
Every morning i smile thinking that some day your face will be the 1st thing I'll see in the morning..flowers never looked so beautiful and colors never seemed so bright..you are every thing i ever wanted and i pray to God that someday you feel the same way too..
Dont want to sound cliched but seriously, no one can and no one will ever replace you..you are the reason to live and I dont want to see the day in my life without you in it..
So please forgive me for i have been stupid..
I may not be the guy of your dreams but I'll make sure every dream of yours come true before you wake up..
I'll make sure every time your feet touches the ground, it finds roses..
I'll make sure every flick of your wrist creates a magic..and every word i say, you hear "I love you"..
I love you..
Today I want to tell u that i love you..and again i hope that its not too late..
Even before i could understand, you became more than just a part of my life..you became all of it..
if i didnt say it, it was because words were always few to explain your place here..
Every morning i smile thinking that some day your face will be the 1st thing I'll see in the morning..flowers never looked so beautiful and colors never seemed so bright..you are every thing i ever wanted and i pray to God that someday you feel the same way too..
Dont want to sound cliched but seriously, no one can and no one will ever replace you..you are the reason to live and I dont want to see the day in my life without you in it..
So please forgive me for i have been stupid..
I may not be the guy of your dreams but I'll make sure every dream of yours come true before you wake up..
I'll make sure every time your feet touches the ground, it finds roses..
I'll make sure every flick of your wrist creates a magic..and every word i say, you hear "I love you"..
I love you..
2010!!
Yes guys its 2011... and now i think its time i break my rule of one post each year and start updating this thing more often..
2010 had been a hectic and fruitful year for me..got a stupid job, got a few more things in life..and most importantly, 2010 saw a reduction in my alcohol consumption- something i am not at all proud of!! :P
Today i am spending so much time in the internet after such a long time that i actually forgot the name of my blog and had to Google search my own blog!! How on earth do i expect a reader following to a blog, the author to which himself has no frigging idea of what its name is!!
But yeah..lets come to the topic..2010..
January started pretty much the same way as 2011..sitting at home in the exact same position, except that i was pretty sure that i was going out of this God forsaken college without a job in hand, without any direction to which my life will be steered in the next few years, and with all my idiotic entrepreneurial ideas shove up my ass..
But today one year later, i have suddenly come to realize that God has been quite kind to me last year... For i got all i wanted and simultaneously remained too busy to complain about the things i didn't..
Highlights:
1) Switched from sarabhai to HIMYM!! And revised every episode as religiously as ever..;)
2) Stopped watching Porn!!- How cool is that?? :)
3) Improved my pocket tanks-skills..
4) Realized that i am a better liar that i thought i was...(Thank you God!!)
5) Observed that if you have access to all entertainment at ur disposal, ur level of boredom multiplies!!
6) Got drunk with college alumni of about my grand father's age..
7) Screwed an array of entrance examination and never felt sorry!!
8) Got a job..
9) Counterparted!! :) :)
10)Guitar and gym took a backseat..
11) Neil Patric Harris became my new role model!! (legen....Dary)
More on it later guys...
But whats important is that each year our lives change a lot..some for good and some otherwise.. we don't wait to think of it anyways but when we do, we come to know how fascinating our world is and there is no way to guess where will we end up next year same time...cause you cannot chase time..you have to sail with it and see where it takes you..
adios!!
2010 had been a hectic and fruitful year for me..got a stupid job, got a few more things in life..and most importantly, 2010 saw a reduction in my alcohol consumption- something i am not at all proud of!! :P
Today i am spending so much time in the internet after such a long time that i actually forgot the name of my blog and had to Google search my own blog!! How on earth do i expect a reader following to a blog, the author to which himself has no frigging idea of what its name is!!
But yeah..lets come to the topic..2010..
January started pretty much the same way as 2011..sitting at home in the exact same position, except that i was pretty sure that i was going out of this God forsaken college without a job in hand, without any direction to which my life will be steered in the next few years, and with all my idiotic entrepreneurial ideas shove up my ass..
But today one year later, i have suddenly come to realize that God has been quite kind to me last year... For i got all i wanted and simultaneously remained too busy to complain about the things i didn't..
Highlights:
1) Switched from sarabhai to HIMYM!! And revised every episode as religiously as ever..;)
2) Stopped watching Porn!!- How cool is that?? :)
3) Improved my pocket tanks-skills..
4) Realized that i am a better liar that i thought i was...(Thank you God!!)
5) Observed that if you have access to all entertainment at ur disposal, ur level of boredom multiplies!!
6) Got drunk with college alumni of about my grand father's age..
7) Screwed an array of entrance examination and never felt sorry!!
8) Got a job..
9) Counterparted!! :) :)
10)Guitar and gym took a backseat..
11) Neil Patric Harris became my new role model!! (legen....Dary)
More on it later guys...
But whats important is that each year our lives change a lot..some for good and some otherwise.. we don't wait to think of it anyways but when we do, we come to know how fascinating our world is and there is no way to guess where will we end up next year same time...cause you cannot chase time..you have to sail with it and see where it takes you..
adios!!
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